Human Sexuality

Sex relations with a partner is normal. Human sexuality has always been hard for people to discuss. Oddly, we all engage in some form of sexuality but no one wants to talk about it. Even for a sex worker like myself has found it difficult at times. Good sexual relations is important not only for reproductive health but also for sexual wellness. How do we start building healthy Growing up I don’t think I had a conversation with an adult about healthy intimacy or sexual gratification. I could’ve benefited as an adult with sex therapy that I missed growing up. As a result, I had a had time expressing my own sexuality, sensuality and found it hard to find bodily pleasure. 

In school, my health class only touched on the reproduction system. Sexual health was never discussed. Sexual relations were bad and would only lead to pregnancy. In addition, abstinence was the only way for sexual wellness. Because I was never to really openly talk about sex it made it that much harder to form good sexual boundaries with partners in the future. 

Sexual Urge

For the longest time I assumed my sexual desire and lust was something to be afraid of. As a result, a sexual urge was immediately deemed as a bad thing. Luckily, I didn’t have to think about it too much; I never had a first kiss till I was a senior in high school. As a result, I was a late bloomer and didn’t understand what a sex act entailed. No one prepped on what sexual gratification was either. I remember seeing a sex scene on TV when I officially realized that a penis went into a vagina.

sexual surge didn't come till I got sober
I didnt understand what a sext act was until a senior in high school
Human sexuality with Jasmin Jai and strokies.com

Adult Pleasure

Because of my inexperience, my first sexual encounter was terrifying. Sexual intimacy with my first boyfriend was almost embarrassing. As a result, I never could allow myself to let go and receive any real sexual pleasure. My sexual comfort level was low as I didn’t understand how my body worked. In addition, I was afraid of my vagina. This cycle of body shame and unknown sexual care continued into my adult sexual relations.

During my early twenties I found it hard to express my true desires. My sexual relations were mostly short lived hookups.  I didn’t communicate with partners. I didn’t care if I received any sexual pleasure. Therefore, I never felt or found sexual satisfaction. 

Once I got sober I got real intimate with myself. 

My Sexual Remedy

All in all, sexual healing has come from a combination of sobriety, stripping and porn. Working in adult entertainment has taught me a lot about my own sexuality and sensuality. Over the years I have become more comfortable with my body and the power of my pussy! Stripping really taught me that guys like different types of shapes and sizes of women. Every woman is beautiful and deserves healthy intimacy between herself and partner(s). 

Sexual health is important 

Stripping became a way to understand my sexuality; posing in front of a mirror

SWOP: Sex Workers Outreach Program

Founded in 2003 in the Bay Area, Sex Workers Outreach Project-USA is a national social justice network dedicated to the fundamental human rights of people involved in the sex trade and their communities, focusing on ending violence and stigma through education and advocacy. On the national level, SWOP helps build stronger communities and a stronger movement through technical assistance, funding, and direct support and advocacy. On a local level, our chapters address structural, cultural, and interpersonal violence individuals in the sex trade face by working to change attitudes, change policies, and create alternative community-led systems of support.

SWOP promotes decriminalization as the best means of decreasing harm and promoting agency amongst people in the sex trade. SWOP adopts the principles and practices of nonviolent action in order to reduce violence and achieve dignity and rights for sex workers. SWOP is committed to the respect, safety, and autonomy of all sex workers, and seeks to amplify the voices of those who are often left out of discourse around the issues we address collectively as a social justice movement.
 

Sexual Relations For Work

Not sure what sex work consists of? Sex work is any type of labor where the explicit goal is to produce a sexual or erotic response in the client. Sex work includes prostitution, but it also includes a bunch of other things like erotic dancing, pro-dom/pro-sub work, webcam work, sensual massage, adult film, phone sex, being a sugar baby, etc.

Sexual Wellness For The Mind

There are many online directories that are useful and can search for local therapists. Psychology Today is a good place to start.

● The American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists directory
● The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom kink-aware professionals directory
● Ask your local SWOP chapter if members have recommendations for local therapists who are competent in working with sex
workers.

Follow and Support SWOP online

Sex Workers Outreach Project
www.swopusa.org | 877-776-2004 | support@swopusa.org

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